The Gift of Time: Youth Is More Than Just Age
People online sometimes comment that I look unusually young for my age. I usually smile it off—after all, can you really believe everything on the internet? But even my husband has often said the same over the years—except during the darkest days of my illness. He thinks Chinese genes give us an edge—when we’re healthy, we often look younger than we are.
I’ll never forget one New Year’s Eve, shortly after we got married, when we went to a fancy restaurant to celebrate. We tried to order wine, but the waiter—a stern-looking white man—refused to serve me. He was convinced I was under 21. I had left my ID in the hotel, so I couldn’t prove otherwise. The truth? I was 34 years old. I remember feeling a mix of embarrassment and amusement—it's a memory that still makes me chuckle.
Now, in my fifties, I look back on that moment with a new kind of reflection. During the years I was seriously ill, I thought youth had slipped away for good. But slowly recovering taught me something unexpected: Youth isn’t just a matter of age—it’s a state of being.
The years of struggle revealed the many faces of human nature. Some people reached out to help when I needed it most. Others turned away—or worse, kicked me when I was down. But those experiences taught me to cherish life in a deeper way. They reminded me that no matter what happens, I must protect the heart I was born with—the one that simply loves being alive.
So what defines true youth? I believe it’s a blend of four things:
- The grace of genetics—a gift from our parents, something to be grateful for, not taken for granted.
- A positive mindset—our attitude radiates through our skin, our posture, our presence.
- Care for the body—even in illness, we must tend to the vessel that carries our spirit.
- The soul reflected outward—our inner work shapes our outer world. What we cultivate inside eventually shows on our face.
Staying positive isn’t always easy—especially during long, painful battles with disease. I’ve faced despair, but I never gave up the pursuit of beauty and meaning. I truly believe that’s what kept me alive—and maybe, what helped preserve the light of youth within me.
It’s hard to draw a clean line between what we’re born with and what we’ve earned. Our appearance in midlife is the result of both. I’m thankful for my genes—but I’m even more thankful that I never stopped loving life or expecting more from myself.
Many of my closest friends today aren’t young by age, but they’re alive with curiosity, energy, and warmth. They remind me every day: We don’t have to be young to feel young.
Time is the greatest teacher. It has taught me this truth: Youth is not a privilege of the young—it’s a way of being, a way of seeing. As long as we keep our hearts open to wonder, embrace change, and seek hope in hard times, we can carry youth within us, no matter our age.
That, to me, is the real meaning of youth—a precious gift time gives to those who keep loving life.
